Party Girl To Stressed School Teacher To Yogi
I'M JUST A GIRL WHO OVER DID IT IN EVERY WAY POSSIBLE, BURNED OUT, GOT SICK AND FOUND HER OWN WAY TO HAPPINESS AND HEALTH
Hi I'm Polly
If I'm honest I used to hate yoga, some kind of flexybendy, happy clappy, self righteous nonsense for sober people with far too much time on their hands. I was too busy! I didn' know but my job was a huge part of the problem. I was department head of a school in Thailand working 7 till 7 6 days a week. I loved the kids so I assumed I loved my work, it had taken me over the world and I'd done a lot of good but I had over worked myself and got beaten by the system. i had given more than I had to give and that's a dangerous place to be in. I didn't like much, for a long time. Drinking water literally never occurred to me, there was plenty in coffee and ice. I didn't want to healthy or settle I liked the stress, I lived off the stress.
I was so wrong.
I now have everything I never wanted and I've never been happier.
I've shared some photos of happy times but there are no photos of the doctor in Bristol telling me in my twenties that I was probably suffering CFS & onset Fibromyalgia and I should prepare to deteriorate for a decade, then discharging me immediately as I was of no fixed abode and didn't fit with the "post code requirements for help"
My inner dialogue was not a loving one, my life was constant anxiety, I took a gram and half of antipsychotics a day (pills that were normally used to sedate epileptics mid-fit and I was prescribed 3 with breakfast, no questions asked!) I was lost.
Although I was no stranger to depression I knew it wasn't depression and I wasn't about to lie down in my 20s and give up! Being the rebel I had always been I decided to look elsewhere for solutions. I NEVER imagined yoga would be the answer! I was so anti yoga and everything it stood for I couldn't take yogi women seriously at all. But it wasn't until I'd exhausted myself looking for answers the answer found me at the foot of a mat. Yoga and nutrition gave me tools to take by control of my life.
I went to every type of western doctor imaginable, in 3 different countries, I had tubes inserted all over me, sent samples all over the world spent money I didn't have (including my wedding fund) and no-one could tell me why I was sick or how to fix me. They simply told me to medicate myself and get used to the fatigue and pains that were guaranteed to get worse over time. No-one would even diagnose me as I moved around too much and I had to prove i was sick for 6 months to year before I could get help.With a history of depression it's often hard to be taken seriously by some medical professionals. "You're just depressed, take some medication"
My 2 keys to success every day were grounding and gratitude. Every moment would soon be gone, pleasure or pain, everything will pass. I just went with the flow and inadvertently learned mindfulness, when it hurt I let it, when I was exhausted I rested but when there was a inclination of energy... My God did i make sure I utilised it.
I learned 3 fundamental things that changed my life, things all wild animals know instinctively.
to breathe with purpose
to move with purpose
to eat with purpose.
This was the decade I was sentenced to pain, discomfort & disability continuously. Instead I chose to question everything, to take responsibility for my own health to make my own path and I can proudly say I have trained as a:
A Women's Health Practitioner
Masseuse. (over 15 therapies under my belt.)
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy Life Coach
I am one of only 3 practicing Womb Yoginis is Spain!
and I'm studying Naturopathy
I have also...
Had a healthy baby
Learned to make mistakes with pride
Learned to fail... hard!
Learned to laugh at myself
Learned to put both legs behind my head
Travelled Central America
Performed circus shows in Burmese Refugee camps
Kept my kitchen continuously clean. (almost)
Married the man of my dreams. He's been my rock, my grounding my twin flame in all of this. In allowing him to love me I also learned to love myself which was the greatest lesson of all
AND MOST IMPORTANTLY I'VE ENJOYED ALL OF IT EVEN THE BAD BITS!
That to me is true freedom!
I revel in the fact that I am perhaps simultaneously the most unlikely yogi and also a destined yogi, life is full of funny paradoxes.